29 weeks and well uh....

So, I had the growth scan today on the little ladies. I really don't know how to start this post. The scan was not my favorite part of the stay here. The girls are now 36% difference in weight gain. I am so disappointed, sad, depressed... name I am it. I really wanted Cali to gain at least a half a pound, but that did not happen. She only gained 2 oz and that is using the high measurements. Savannah weighed 2 lbs 14 oz. She is gaining, but I am worried about my Cali-kay!

I don't know about the the ratio with the doppler flow, but I know anything under 4 is okay to good. Savannah was 2.5 and Cali was 4.6. So, she is not terrible, but still not growing as she should. The tech was very good at explaining things today and made me feel a little better, but not great.

I came back from my scan and just cried and cried. I talked to Aaron and my mom, that's it on the phone. I stopped answering my phone because I just didn't want to say it out loud anymore. Of course my brother right on cue walked through the door with milkshake in hand. I just cried and threw my arms around him. He has a way to make me feel better. Thank God for his funny stories about his boys.

The peri finally came in to talk to me about everything and I hope I get this right. I shut down mentally at the mention of stillborn. Aaron was here to catch everything and tell me again.

So, I am here to stay until the end of the pregnancy. I am officially never getting off hospital bedrest. There is nothing they can do to help Cali gain weight. I am here just to be hooked up to the monitors for an NST two times a day to make sure they are reactive and blood and oxygen are still flowing. If they fail the NST I go downstairs for an biophysical profile. On Mondays and Thursdays I will go down for doppler flow test to make sure there are no changes. Every other Thursday I will go for a growth scan.

They would like to see me make it until 34 weeks. They will take the babies if there is no growth and bad NST's. The peri did say they weren't as worried about the growth as they were about the development of their organs which should be okay by 34 weeks and the blood and oxygen flow.

So here is my home until the babies come....

Hubby is on his part-time bed.

29 weeks and yes you can tell I have been crying all day.

Here is what my belly looks like when I am hooked up to the monitors:)